I'm Done

That's right,

I'm done!

Today was the day of my final exams; Psychology, Sociology and Criminology all in one day. So for six hours straight today, with only a half-hour break every two hours, I was giving, grading and posting grades.

JOY.

I've been caught up with getting things finished for the term for the past week or so (tons of papers to grade) and haven't been posting much to the blog. There really hasn't been much to publish other than "Yes, I'm -still- reading papers". So I decided to postpone any substantive post until I was finished. And now...

I'M DONE!!

God it feels good to say that so I'll say it once more.

I'M FINALLY DONE!!!

Ok, anyway.

It's not that I don't like my job. I love my job. I even like a percentage of my students. However there's something that I need to get off my chest.

There is a new form of evil in the world. Yes,

E-vil

Back in the chapters of history, we all knew this horrible concept as simply as self-important girls who attempted to twist anything and anyone to do their bidding. Oddly enough they were able to turn schools, clicks and whole athletic teams into their disciples. You all knew them. They were at your school in one form or another. Their evil was known by another name:

HEATHERS

This evil was was thought to have been destroyed and forgotten with the shoulder pads for which they were known.

Stalking the halls like an unholy quadruplet of attitude (that's At-ta-tude for those who know how to pronounce the head-shake devil language spoken only by click-chicks, drag queens and poorly acted villains of the 80's), they simply assumed that their powers of accessorization and haircare gave them ultimate authority.

Now let us move forward to college, let's say a small University. This evil has been reborn not with shoulder pads or with poofy 80's hair, but with something much much worse.

Hip Huggers

Dressed like their momma's didn't teach them how to pull up their damned pants, the evil struts their way around our campus and heads turn.

The girls want to be them.

The guys want to be WITH them.

They are the spawn of an ancient evil.

And their name is:

ASHLEY

The Ashley, they are plural and are therefor named as such, are an evil horde of women that descended up on Shawnee's campus and more to the point, my classes. I have three Ashley's in Criminology, two in Psych and one in Sociology. Each one of them is a clone of the other. They do not participate in class, when they actually bother attending. Each of them had to be told "Do not text on your phone in my class," only once. I say once, not because they stopped the behavior, but actually because they just stopped coming to class.

Only attending on test days, sometimes missing the test day completely, they routinely scored below 50% even with an in-class review of the material on the previous class and hand-outs to help them study. To me, this was their inability, or unwillingness to put forth any effort towards their classes. According to one of the Ashley:

"Grades aren't important. Life is just like High School - it's not WHAT you know but WHO you know."

So now that we were winding up the course, the Ashley attempted to once again use their powers to their own end.

This is when one Evil met another kind of Evil.

Sparks flew through the air and the ground broke apart to spew fire and death.

The Ashley met opposition and for the first time in their lives (according to the shocked looks on their faces) they were not given what they wanted.

Yes.

I crushed their widdle egos.

I ruined their widdle lives.

I failed their sorry, hoochy-momma, crack-whore-thong wearin' asses!!

And...

I'm Done!

Expect more frequent updates now that